How Art is Born- Our Lady of Mystery
I have been wanting to create a Mother Mary painting for years now. Sometimes, it is a long gestation period between ideas and creation.
I am reminded of this beautiful quote by fine artist D Michelle Perry. “There are times when ideas flow like Niagara and other times when they are a slowly meandering stream. One is not success, and the other is not failure.” Patience is a beautiful virtue for an artist!
I think the creation of art falls under the category of mystery because one doesn’t know when an image is ready to appear in physical form. There is a lot of ebb and flow, of movement and waiting when creating art, especially when waiting for a piece that wants to be born, as I think this Mary image was. To me, it means the fullness of Mary needed to be grown inside, meditated and prayed about, held in the quiet, before she made it to the canvas. A painting that is born means there is symbolism that relates to my life and hopefully the messages can guide me to some insights and healing.
At the beginning of the year, I was gifted a Mother Mary journal and then proceeded to buy a Mother Mary oracle deck, and I continue to draw a card a day, to see what messages Mother Mary has for me.
Along with the messages, I began to really see the images in a different way. I might draw a Mary card one day and see flowing robes in the way I might put them into the design, or hands holding an object, or a face that looked like what I was imagining in my head.
As an artist who doesn’t do portraits, faces and hands are two of the hardest things to paint, so I gathered my inspiration from other images to help my idea come to life. Words in my journal lead me to call her Our Lady of Mystery before she even started to come alive on the canvas.
In June, during a period of acute digestive distress, I spent more time at home, less time doing my normal business things. I felt like I was sitting on the sidelines of my life, but perhaps I was just sitting quietly enough to hear the whispers of Our Lady of Mystery, who was waiting for me to help her show up on canvas. If I hadn’t been at home those days, she might not be finished.
I started with the light color of her gown as the background but then found the copper paper, perfect for an icon of Mary. When I saw the blue and gold paper, I knew it was meant to be the color of Mary’s robe. The inside paper was left over from a goddess picture, and appropriately, it made me feel like Mary carries all this goddess energy with her. She is a strong woman, among the stars, leading the way. I purposely did not make the sides of Mary’s robe even, especially around her face. This was intentional to remember that nothing in life is perfect. Outside appearances do not matter. Mary’s message is always to show up in the best way you can- never perfect- but with an open, compassionate heart.
Other than her face, her hands and later the three layers of the tree of life, all of this is created with torn pieces of paper that are then glued down with a gloss medium. It takes a lot of time to rip and then glue!
A tree of life kept showing up in my journal. The one I chose had to be one I could easily cut from paper that still showed detail. In old Celtic traditions, a specific tree was a ceremonial meeting place, a place where community gathered for their rituals. This tree would be a symbol of the heart of the community, a place where unseen connections remind people they belong together. It might have been a wishing tree, where people left their prayers for healing, wishes for a better future. How convenient that the one I chose also had a heart among its branches!
I added the Celtic triquetra for its power of three, an ancient symbol for the trinity. In my world, the power of three also symbolizes three daughters, maiden-mother-crone, life-death-resurrection, faith-hope-love.
What I didn’t notice until later was the tree had two roots. In journaling with the image and Mary, I realized that was part of the mystery. It is our faith that helps us hold together the opposites of life- life and death, darkness and light, sickness and health. It is only when we come home to our hearts and rest in compassion and love that we can hold the tension between two opposites.
What I have learned from this creation is that I must surrender to where I am. There are good days and bad days. And even in the bad days, I can truly live if I allow that which wants to be born to move through my hands onto a canvas. Perhaps this is how my light shines the most- through adversity- showing the power of a resilient heart.
In her book Bittersweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole, Susan Cain shares a definition of “bittersweet-a tendency to states of longing, poignancy, and sorrow; an acute awareness of passing time; and a curiously piercing joy at the beauty of the world. The bittersweet is also about the recognition that light and dark, birth and death—bitter and sweet—are forever paired.”
This is how I feel about Our Lady of Mystery. She is bittersweet- able to hold the pain AND the beauty of the world. She holds the pain and beauty of my life. When I lean in, and don’t try to force everything to work to my will, I am able to see and feel the light and joy that comes through, even when my body isn’t at its best. Even when the darkness of the world closes in, I can find solace in the beauty that is around me. I know I am held in love.
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